Dragons without princesses

Many people I know write about the last year, what they’ve done, what they haven’t, what they are proud of, what they are not. They make promises, resolutions for the next 365-day turn of their lives. And I totally don’t feel like doing it this year, somehow, it’s not a cliff edge like it was about 53-4 weeks ago. I am still going.

The last half an hour I was looking though the entries of my diary, my joys and sorrows of the 2015. I read my resolutions from the last year and realised I’ve almost done what I promised myself. But last year I was very sure of what I wanted to erase from my life and what I was going to look for, try out. This year it is not as crystal clear, I don’t have those Plans. I just don’t want to stop drawing, see new things, breathe fresh air, spend time with some people. I would like to be more structured and maybe straightforward, I’d like to be better at making decisions, be stronger. The usual stuff, you know. But this year the usual stuff doesn’t feel so ordinary, it feels more important. So I think I am very ambitious and all I want is to become better next year, for the selfish me and for the people I care about.

I think the most important personal thing that happened to me during the last year is that I overcame my laziness and started drawing and painting at least once a week. What makes me feel really good is that I see I’m slowly getting better. And now, after reading a book (or maybe more honest would be: after looking at the pictures in a book) by onlc3bcbecke talented Russian illustrator I realised, I don’t need to wait for inspiration, I should just sit down and draw what’s around me, what happened to me, or something interesting from the place I just visited. It makes life easier and sort of more productive. No extraordinary masterpieces are to be created, you are just learning by doing.

So I started keeping a sketchbook diary about something interesting or a bit special that happens to me or I just get to see. Two days ago we went to Lübeck all together and I met this charming chubby dragon. It was guarding the entrance to the local puppet theater. I thought the character was very ably made, so I thought it deserves to have a place in my drawn diary.

 

Well, princesses.. Have you met any recently?

Merry Christmas

Yes, Merry Christmas everyone 🙂

Hope you are having cozy time and eating well))

I just realised I forgot to show the postcards I made this year. I started with them quite spontaneously and hope next year will be more structured ^^ but I still managed a bit.

I found a book with hundreds of beautiful illustrations under the tree, so I think the next couple of days I’ll just be drinking ginger tea (thanks for a nice new recipe, Ania:), turn those beautiful pages and maybe doodle a bit myself in a new sketchbook. I love those days when everything is closed anyways, so sitting at home is not totally uncool.

I’m hiccuping like crazy the last couple of days. In Russia we say, it is because someone is thinking of me or remembering me. Christmas time.

Civilization

%d1%87%d0%b5%d0%bc%d0%be%d0%b4%d0%b0%d0%bd%d0%bd%d0%be%d0%b5-copyProbably the virtue of civilization I value most is hot water from the tap. I often think about Høeg’s Smilla:  being half-grinlandic, she also had this special relationship with hot water. And apparently, I just value comfort a lot in general.

I was travelling again, and this time I realized how much I actually love capitalism. I was in Moldova for 5 days and a week later in laos for almost two weeks. Moldova was work,  Laos – pure entertainment and curiosity indulgement.

Laos is an interesting country. Very rural,  very undemanding,  seems. For example, by leafing through the Atlas I came across at the Lao national library (an old mansion where the catalogue is still hand-written :3), I realised I just spent half of the month’s allowance of a common citizen of the Lao People’s Democratic Republic by having a coffee and cake in a French bakery down the road. Felt weird and a bit ashamed, though, for a short while. The whole country has only one shopping mall and it’s not really a shopping mall, but a covered market 🙂 Ladies go a lot in traditional silk skirts. School girls are wearing it too, but in dark blue as the uniform (and ride their bikes holding an umbrella in one hand to protect themselves from the sun, so cute :3). And many other facts that surprised me a bit and made feel sympathetic in some way.

I have many pictures, some of them are even good, but, of course,  still not sorted out (busy bee and priorities problem).

An emotion that surprised me a bit: I was very happy to come back to Thailand (was traveling through Bangkok from Europe and back), mostly because it’s a more comfortable country to be in.  What a spoiled creature I am.

I am often thinking I should focus less on things and more on ideas, learning and self-development, but quite quickly I realize I’m a lot about things. I’m not that free-spirited person I’d like to be. I’m a consumer,  by-product of capitalism or whatever you call it. So it goes.